Christmas Countdown 2007: Ground Zero!!!

Lon Chaney Jr.- "Monster's Holiday" (Tower Records, 1964)




This delightful little .45 single is actually fairly hard to come by, but it's charming little tale of monsters hi-jacking Santa's sleigh is too heart-warming not to share...

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Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (Golden Records SLP170, 1964)



Sadly, my scanner crapped out on me, so I couldn't include the scans of the actual comic, but here's the album...

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Merry Christmas, everyone....hopefully Droppo Claus visits each and every one of you all.

Christmas Countdown 2007: Lum n' Abner Christmas 1940 Broadcast (12/25/40)

As I mentioned in a previous post, I love "hillbilly" movies and such, and one of my favorite things of this type of thing being the classic radio comedy, Lum n' Abner. The radio comedy spawned 7 films during the 1940s, all of which are available in some shape or form on cheap-ass DVDs from various manufacturers.

From Wikipedia:

Lum and Abner, an American radio comedy which aired as a network program from 1932 to 1954, became an American institution in its low-keyed, arch rural wit. One of a series of 15-minute serial comedies that dotted American radio at its height as America's number one home entertainment—others included Amos 'n' Andy, Easy Aces, The Goldbergs, and Vic and Sade—Lum and Abner included various elements of each but yielded something as singular as the others and became somewhat more of an institution.

The creation of co-stars Chester Lauck (who played Columbus "Lum" Edwards) and Norris Goff (Abner Peabody), Lum and Abner was as low-keyed as Easy Aces, as cheerfully absurdist as Vic and Sade, and raised The Goldbergs ethnic focus by amplifying the protagonists' regional identities. As the co-owners of the Jot 'em Down Store in the then-fictional town of Pine Ridge, Arkansas, they were always stumbling upon moneymaking ideas only to get themselves fleeced by nemesis Squire Skimp, before finding one or another way to redeem themselves, Lum and Abner played the hillbilly theme with deceptive cleverness: The hillbillies just knew the slickers were going to get theirs, sooner or later, and either didn't mind or knew more than they let on that the slickers getting theirs was a matter of fortunate circumstance.

Lauck and Goff had known each other since childhood and attended the University of Arkansas together (joining the Sigma Chi Fraternity together while there). They performed locally and established a blackface act which led to an audition at radio station KTHS in Hot Springs, Arkansas. Prior to the audition, the two men decided to change their act and portray two hillbillies, since there were already an overabundance of blackface acts at the time. After only a few shows in Hot Springs, they were picked up nationally by NBC, and Lum and Abner, sponsored by Quaker Oats, ran until 1932. Lauck and Goff performed several different characters, modeling many of them after real-life residents of Waters, Arkansas.

After the Quaker contract expired, Lauck and Goff continued to broadcast over two Texas stations, WBAP (Fort Worth) and WFAA (Dallas). In 1933, Ford Motor Company became their sponsor for approximately a year. Horlick's Malted Milk, the 1934-37 sponsor, offered a number of promotional premium items, including almanacs and fictional Pine Ridge newspapers. During this period, the show originated from Chicago's WGN, one of the founding members of the Mutual Broadcasting System. In 1936, the city council of Waters changed the town's name to Pine Ridge.[1] Postum cereal sponsored Lum and Abner in 1938-39, before Alka-Seltzer picked up the duo for eight years. Over the course of its life, Lum and Abner appeared on all of the major radio networks, CBS and ABC (formerly NBC Blue), in addition to NBC and Mutual.

One of my favorite episodes of the series has always been the annual Christmas episode that was traditionally broadcast during the holidays. For download this go-around of the 2007 Christmas Countdown, I've posted the 1940 broadcast of it, and I hope that you find it as touching and fun as I have for years.

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Christmas Countdown 2007: More Martian Hijinx and Bobby Helms, "Captain Santa Claus", DECCA label # 9-30513 (1957)

For today's installment of the 2007 Christmas Countdown, here's another cover of Milton DeLugg's "Hooray For Santa Claus", which was the theme to Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964), this time by one of my favorite punk bands, Sloppy Seconds. This is taken from their 2004 EP, Lonely Christmas. And, for the "B-Side" of this installment is one of my favorite Christmas themed B-Sides, "(Here Comes) Captain Santa Claus and His Reindeer Space Patrol", from the original 1957 Decca .45 release of "Jingle Bell Rock" by Bobby Helms.

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Christmas Countdown 2007: Superheroes Christmas (Power Records/Peter Pan #8199)

I've owned this record since around the age of 6, and because of it, nothing says Christmas like Wonder Woman beating up a Germanic Nazi type and the image of Batman in a fake beard.

Track Listing:

01 Light Up The Tree, Mr. President (Superman)
02 Christmas Carol Caper (Batman)
03 Prisoner of Christmas Island (Wonder Woman)

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Christmas Countdown 2007: Merry Christmas from Lee Majors (or, a close facsimile)

I used to love both The Six Million Dollar Man and The Bionic Woman as a child, which led to one of my three first childhood celebrity crushes, Lindsay Wagner...the other two being the Jessica Drew Spider-Woman and Lynda Carter...I was a weird kid. Don't even get me started on Jessi Colter and Lily Munster, because then it gets really scary...

Anyways, for this installment of the Christmas Countdown, I bring you this bundle of bionic audio joy from 1978.

Track Listing:

01 THE TOYMAKER
02 THE KRIS KRINGLE CAPER
03 CHRISTMAS LIGHTS
04 THE ELVES' REVOLT

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Christmas Countdown 2007: Mexican Santa Claus/ Buck Owens

1959's Mexi-cinema production of El Santo Claus (aka Santa Claus here in the States) is kinda like what I'd imagined would happen if one produced a holiday special while high on weed, or possibly after a few hits of blotter acid. This is why it's become a "classic" amongst those of us who find joy in watching stuff so bad, it's funny. I find the film incredibly endearing...I mean, what's not to love about terrible unintentional racial stereotypes, Santa living on a cloud in outer space (next door to Merlin's castle) and his long-time war against Satan?

The thing I find more amazing is that this flick was a staple of holiday season matinées for well over two decades (!!!!).....and folks wonder why those that grew up in the 60s and 70s are so....well, fucked up? (I count myself amongst that crowd, having been born in 1974)....

Another thing I find endearing is the work of musician Buck Owens....I blame my parents and their insane need to watch Hee-Haw. I've loved Owens' stuff for years, and his Christmas tunes are some of the most screwed up stuff you can listen to during the holiday season.....it's usually either about how some sad little kid can't understand where Daddy is ("Daddy" and/or "Mommy" in a Buck tune is usually a careless ne'er-do-well, who doesn't have time for such trivial things as a faithful marriage, spending time with children or sobriety)....or, the confusion a child has for the whole concept of "Santy Claus". All just jolly funtime stuff, kids....

So, for tonight's installment, I decided to throw up the original radio spot for the K. Gordon Murray dubbed English release of SANTA CLAUS, and a little Christmas Buck. In along with the late Mr. Alvin Owens' stuff, I've included the track "Satan's Got to Get Along Without Me", which recently turned up on the soundtrack for the film THE DEVIL'S REJECTS, because like me, director Rob Zombie is a hardcore Owens fan. I thought that the tune sorta fit the theme of the film: Santa Claus' ongoing war against the forces of Satan.

You've heard about that one, right?

Track Listing:

Santa Claus (1959)

01- Radio Spot

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Buck Owens Christmas

01 Satan's Got to Get Along Without Me
02 Here Comes Santa Claus Again
03 All I Want For Christmas Is You
04 Because It's Christmas Time
05 Blue Christmas Lights
06 Santa Looked A Lot Like Daddy
07 Santa's Gonna Come In A Stagecoach
08 Tomorrow Is Christmas Day
09 Good Old Fashioned Country Christmas
10 Christmas Time's A Coming
11 It's Christmas Time For Everyone But Me

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Christmas Countdown 2007: The Go-Gos- "I'm Gonna Spend My Christmas With a Dalek" (Oriole 1964)

My youth was filled with many a day sitting on my lazy ass after school in front of my parents' (what at the time seemed HUGE) 25 in. color Admiral television set, watching the local PBS affiliate. Everyday, like clockwork, everything dropped at 5 p.m......because it was at that hour that I made the effort to spend some quality time with Dr.Who.

For the uninformed, Who is a long-running (like 4 decades long) BBC television series about an eccentric alien time traveler, known only the Doctor (hence the title: "Doctor.... Who?"). If you've never heard about it, you must have either just been born within the last 10 years or have been living a hermit's existence....it seems anytime I mention watching PBS as a child, the response is general either about the children's programming....or the Good Doctor.

In 1963, one of Doc's more popular bad guys, the alien robot/cyborg Daleks were introduced, and a brief period of Dalekmania engulf the UK, from which was this novelty Christmas single by the Brit-Pop group the Go-Gos (not to be confused with the 1980s girl-group) group from Newcastle, was released the following Chistmas...

Now, thanks to a childhood obsession and the wonders of the inner-nets (curse you, eBay!!!), I can share my copy of this delightful little ditty:

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"EX-TER-MI-NATE!, EX-TER-MI-NATE!"

Christmas Countdown 2007: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

Joy of Joys!!! It truly is the season of miracles! And.....Martians!!

Ahem....after nearly 2 decades (!!!!) of searching, one of my of my Christmas wishes has finally been realized....

One of my first experiences with the world of B Movies was 1964's Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, a low-budget cheesfest that I first had the pleasure of viewing during the Christmas of 1988...and it has since become a holiday tradition of mine to view it. It's quite possibly one of my favorite "bad movies" of all time...

Prior to seeing it, though, I was aware that there had been a Dell comic book adaptation published in 1964 (thanks to religious reading of Overstreet's Comic Book Price Guide), and a few years ago, after years of searching, I actually came across a copy which I purchased.

The credits of the film itself mention that the movie's theme song, "Hooray For Santy Claus", was at one point released on vinyl, but I've never been able to track down a copy. I believe it may be a case of an extremely limited release .45 single...or, this release announced by the opening credits of the flick may be non-existent.

But....

Years ago, I was informed that Dell (a branch of what would later become Western Publishing, the folks behind numerous children's books and, in the 1970s, Golden and Peter Pan children's records) had released a read-along vinyl packaged with copies of the comic (Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, Golden Records SLP170) at some point in the 1960s, and for years I'd had hoped to run across a copy.

Well, tonight, after a visit to the local Goodwill thrift store....that hope has finally bore fruit. And, it only cost me 90 cents....though my copy no longer possesses the copy of the comic shrink-wrapped to the back of the album, it's of no matter, seeing as how I already own a copy of the funnybook's newsstand release version....

So, to kick off what I hope will be the first annual Christmas Countdown, I've thrown together a little Santa Claus Conquers the Martians package for download, so that other can find the joy that I've found over the years in this little holiday season cult classic...

Track Listing:

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

01- Hooray For Santy Claus- Milton DeLugg and the Little Eskimos

Monk Seven is a Japanese techno artist who recorded this delightful little ditty using samples from the film:

Monk Seven

01- Santa On Mars

A few years back, oddball European musician Senor Tonto recorded a cover version of "Hooray for Santy Claus", which I've included the single of in this package:

Senor Tonto

01- Hooray For Santy Claus
02- Hooray For Santy Claus (instrumental)

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Also, as my first gift to my readers this Christmas, here's a download link for the film in MPEG format (hosted by Internet Archive)

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964) Download (567 mb)